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Overcoming 'The Confidence Gap'

One of the more lucid realizations I had growing up was centered around energy. More specifically, the first time I became acutely aware of dominant, male energy. Details of the encounter are irrelevant, (mostly because I can’t remember them) but what is important was how in tune I’d become with male energy thereafter.

Any type of dominant energy is an intimidating force. Usually, we experience dominant energy as dominant masculine energy, rarely feeling it in feminine features. Body movements, tone of voice and presentation all feed dominant characteristics .

Whether you have been in the past or not, it’s possible to work your way towards becoming a more dominant person. A strong grasp on confidence can change the way people approach you, as well as the way you approach others. If you’re aren’t an assertive person, this is probably due to a lack of confidence in yourself.

Confidence is seriously key 🔑

In the world of business and economics, there’s a definite wage gap between men and women.

A few years ago, The Atlantic posted an article titled, "The Confidence Gap.” “The Confidence Gap” is a phenomenon that’s been discovered in the world of working women, and has taught us that building this feat up again takes effort and mindset adjustment.

Authors Katty Kay and Claire Shipman, both successful female journalists who have based most of their work in and out of Washington D.C, highlighted the external factors that attributed to women's lack of self esteem: How we were brought up, the way we view our “higher” authority, and the natural comparison within us to our male counterparts.

The article’s take away is summed up in a few points: 1. Exposure and perseverance to failure is the best way to build confidence, and 2: Overselling yourself and believing you can will cause you to yield higher results than those who don’t believe they can.

Leveraging in a world ruled by masculine energy, there’s bound to be a natural suppression of the feminine, thus more women are born and bred with a lesser ability to make assured decisions. The sooner we accept this as truth, the sooner we can work towards closing the confidence and wage gap alike.

Women tend to second guess and over-think, rather than do. They are unsure of their ability to lead and often allow male counterparts to succeed over them. As adults, we know that even if you aren’t so sure, it’s better to act like you’re sure than to admit you don’t know anything at all. Being able to display confidence in the necessary situations is the most important part of having it.

Your body senses

Dominating, albeit nurturing, feminine energy can take down a room- if you allow it. It begins with your senses, the thoughts you feed yourself. Confidence can be a genetic predisposition that strengthens or weakens you, depending on the factors of your lifestyle.

Tapping into your 5 senses is critical to making sure you’re releasing the dominant energy within you. Your awareness of body flow and the energy you give off to others is essential so that you can stay aware of the things you say, what you do, and how you approach situations.

Feminine energy and masculine energy derive confidence in different manners, but with the same results. When you learn to recognize the feelings of your dominating persona, that’s when you can begin reaping results.

“Be a good girl,” a phrase you’ve heard over and over again- and a definite hit to the ego. Usually, being “a good girl” is accompanied with softer, “more feminine” qualities of persona. “Good girls” don’t speak out of turn, if ever, and when they do, it should be short-clipped and to the point. Louder, assertive, dominant women tend to lack success in society, because they are an unfavored type in what we consider “attractive.”

Mind-Body language

Your mind and body are the most important factors for confidence. With over 65,000 thoughts floating through your head daily, it’s difficult to be able to stay in full concentration mode in your everyday life. You’re looking for a way to release your strongest desires and abilities; being bold with your decisions allows you to do just that.

As a woman, there’s naturally a lot more fear instilled within you growing up. Each sex and gender has it’s own weaknesses, but speaking from experience, women tend to derive their lack of self confidence from the fears that we’re taught as girls.

In one of the studies referenced, research psychologist Zachary Estes conducted an experiment of 500 tests, requiring students to reorganize 3-D images. On the first round, women scored much lower than men- that is, until Estes required all the students to answer all the questions, regardless if they could answer the puzzle or not.

The second round yielded a complete different set of results. Women did just as well as men after being forced to answer the puzzles, regardless of whether they believed they could or not. This, coupled with previous proclamations of confidence linking to back high-powered women in the academic and business world, seemed to prove that women’s lack of trust in themselves remains the sole reason we are held back in our society.

A woman’s dominate energy can be released from different outlets. It can be in the workplace, it could be in the bedroom, or carried with you throughout your everyday tasks. Regardless of whether dominating a room comes naturally or not, you are capable.

There’s nothing you can’t do. There’s no body who’s above you, more capable than you, or more deserving than you.

#confidence #selfesteem #selfimprovement #selfreflection